Scouting is just like any other organization in one important way. It’s made up of people – people of varying talents and abilities and moods and personalities.

It’s obvious that those people, whether the Scouts themselves or the adult leaders and parents who support them, share a lot of common interests and values. That fact, along with training programs, organizational materials and role descriptions from the national organization, help make things operate in a pretty orderly way. And most of the time it’s a lot of fun.

But all of that certainly doesn’t preclude frustrations and conflicts from developing among Scouts, leaders, and parents. As with any group of people, there is unavoidable friction that leads inevitably to disagreements.

As Scoutmaster, one thought I try to keep in front of myself constantly, and especially at those times when disagreements arise, is that all of these people are involved in Scouting voluntarily. Sure, parents will push their kids to become involved and stay involved in our program if it’s something they themselves value highly. And of course, everybody has paid membership fees, so there’s some skin in the game that way too. Plenty of Scouts are working to achieve the vaunted Eagle rank, and that ultimate goal will help keep them around through difficult times.

But even with all of that, if things got too ugly or unpleasant, people will start to opt out. If I’m frustrated with a fellow adult leader, and I choose to chew him out, exactly how long do you think he’ll put up with that? Or similarly, if I’m constantly screaming at the Scouts when they get out of line, do you think they’ll keep coming to meetings and campouts? Or will they quietly fail to re-enroll when annual sign-up time comes around again?

I’m not claiming to be perfect. I’ll sometimes get short with the kids, and I’ve had some serious episodes of misbehavior to deal with when I got rather heated. I’ve had a few tense discussions with fellow adult leaders, too. But one of the things I set for myself as a goal when I took over as Scoutmaster was the simple objective of giving out ten positive comments for every critical one. If I can hit that target, then I know my Scouts and fellow adult leaders are hearing praise a heck of a lot more than they’re hearing criticism. Plus, focusing on that level of positive feedback tends to keep my mood pretty even, I think.

Now let’s swing all that thinking over to the workplace. “That’s a totally different situation,” you might say. “We pay really good money for our people to come to work, so I’m completely justified in losing my temper if they aren’t living up to expectations.” Yeah, only here’s the problem: those people are all volunteers too. Sure, they make their living from what your company is paying them, so most of them can’t just up and quit. Plus even if they can afford it, job searches are tough and frustrating – who would want to put themselves through that?

And yet people do just up and quit, don’t they? Oh sure, there are a lot of reasons for that. A worker might simply get a better offer, or a better work schedule, or a better location for where they live, and on and on. But while it may not be 100% accurate every time, there’s a good reason the saying, “people don’t quit jobs, they quit bosses,” resonates with so many folks.

If you don’t treat people like they’re doing you a favor by being there – whether it’s in Scouting or in the workplace – before too long they won’t be there anymore. It’s as simple as that.